caveboy and lepird chapter 2 in the woods

caveboy and lepird chapter 2 in the woods
i went away from my ma. i walked betweeen trees in the tiny forest beside my family cave. beyond the trees i reached the flat plain plain.the green grass looked pretty and no zebras were nearby to eat it due to the man hunters. far ahead i saw brown animals on a background of green grass and a white waterfall. they seemed tiny. i chose to run toward them.
i ran and i ran... that is why that grassy plain is named iran. until they changed it to persia much later when no grass remained. i was running for so long that i noticed the sun was moving. who was pushing the sun? i imagined a group of invisible animals pulling the sun from where i had seen it when i started running at the edge of the woods until now.
my legs started to ache same as i had felt in my dream.. or was it a memory? but this time i was running because i chose! i wanted to get to the white waterfall. while a strained and ran i was breathing deep and fast. i planned not to return to the cave. i knew that at night this area had lepirds like lions except their fur had groups of spots as if a human hand with fingers had stained each one of them with spots. which was impossible... but that is the appearence.
pa had told me that "in the beginning" were only lions. then one day a man stabbed a lady lion. when he saw it was pregnant with babies inside he cut many long lines on its side until he ripped the babies out. that caused the babies to have lines like the cuts on their dying ma. they were the first tigers. my pa said a different lion was resting after eating zebra. a man hunter threw a spear at it. it started birthing a baby. when he tried to help pull the baby out from the dying mother lion his bloody fingers marked her fur that caused the babies to have groups of spots they were the first lepirds.
i liked those stories better than the alternative that some "mystery god had made different lions with different decorations." i believed they differed from the panther family.
the sun had already moved very far much further than me! no animals could move the sun so fast! i considered the alternative... if i were on a boat moving then even if the sun was NOT it would seem to move. i concluded i must be on a boat that was moving, the ground must be a boat moving so the sun appeared to move. it had moved from the side of shining to the side of dark, by the time i reached the place of the waterfall. the brown animals had long ago finished eating and left away. i had planned to sleep in a tree at night so the lepirds who roamed would not see me on the ground. but the plain lacked trees. i started climbing the bumpy rocks beside the short waterfall.  it was only three times my child height. i reached the top and discovered i was on a ledge. if my hieght was one meter long then from the edge i had just climbed to the rock wall behind me was four meters. that is the length the water ran from the waterfall across to the edge. on each side of the waterfall was around ten meters. i realized no lepirds from above could come down the cliff nor approach from sides due to the steep edge nor my back due to the wall of hill by the waterfall.
i felt thirsty from running and drank from the cool clear water. i felt so tired that even before dark i slept until day 2.
i awoke due to bright light. i had survived my first night by the waterfall.
i felt cold but the sun was warming me. i climbed down and tried to eat grass like the zebra but my teeth did not cut the grass instead the thin grass cut the skin inside my mouth. that was surprising considering that grass is soft. i ripped grass with my fingers and despite succeeding my hands were cut. i tried to chew the grass but nothing changed i could only swallow the lump of green grass to fill my hungry stomach. suddenly i noticed a tree on my ledge. i was certain it wasnot there when i slept. the waterfall must have been jealous that the grasss had ME as a companion and it had made a tree to be its companion. that was the only logical explanation.
if the tree were there yesterday i could have done my plan and climbed it and slept on its branches but i recalled measuring the ledge and no tree was there not even one was "zer" so i invented the word zero meaning not even one tree. now was one tree. i climbed it and started eating the broad leaf. it tasted very bitter and bad but i felt hungry so i swallowed and chewed and pulled more and ate until i filled my stomik. i felt horror despite stuffing it FULL of gross bitter green leaves i felt hungry! i thought hunger meant empty yet still i felt hungry when full?
i must hunt a mammoth or a zebra or a brown antlope. i looked over the edge of the ledge and saw the herd was drinking below me. many brown antlope. i grabbed a big rock and aimed at the head of a helpless antlope nearby. it flew down and hit its head. the others fled. i went to the injured one and tried to eat it like lepirds bite but my teeth only cut a bit into it. my teeth were bad for both grass and for meat what food was for me. surely a "plan" was impossible. noone planned to make the product that i was: a being that felt hunger and also unable to bite both grass and animal. lepird teeth could eat animal but i could not. this antlope could eat grass but i could not. my hunger intensified so despite i failed to bite the antlope skin i must continue trying. i dug my teeth and my mouth bones hrut and face muscles burned but the bitter leaves that i had "with difficulty of bitter taste" swallowed for my hunger had not changed my hanger.
finally after much effort i managed to pull a chunk of tough muscle from under the skin and tried to chew bt it would not crumble like cooked food. i must make a fire. however the trees with wood were so far away. it would take me all day even running to reach them and then i could not return carrying wood before dark and anyway i felt weak with hunger so i just drank water. but that did not help hunger eaither.
the hunger grew each hour. soon i would surrender and return to ma but then she would yell so much that was impossible and unbearable. the agony intensified. i must end the pain. i climbed the steep cliff of the higher waterfall. i felt scared i would slip and fall... and said that was true if i would add to my pain. so i climbed higher until i was sure i would die. i waited for the hunger to go away but it did not... so i pushed off the edge and felt fear GREAT fear as i fell but i knew i must end my pain. OW! hitting the soft grass hurt but only a moment all went black.
i was floating in a tunnel. around me was a long circle like a cave whose sides were not rock nor mountain but glowing nothing of light. it was not solid but it was not liquid ether so i named it ether. i moved along the tunnel in front of me was the hollow between the glowing walls of light and darkness at the end of the tunnel. i wondered if i had died and my pa had died therefore we would meet and i did not want to see that mean man.
while i floated forward i tried to raise my fingers to see them but i did not have any hands nor fingers nor arms. yet if i am moving i must have legs? i looked down but instead of the chest and legs that i expected i saw nothing below me. i tried to touch my eyes and feel them but i lacked hands to feel them. i must be only one eye nothing more floating in a light cave it was the only logical explanation.
finally i reached the end of the tunnel and a swirl of light in the form of a long tail coiled in layers stood before me. somebody said "you died too early." it was the light speaking.
"if you know so much then tell me who made this horrible combination of a being with hunger with bad teeth." 
"i did" answered the light.
"you are an idiot fool. if you make something then make it good."
"i was unable and failed" said the creator light.
"i added to my argument, "when we make a sharp tool of rock in industry not only using tools but making the tool we make a good tool but you made bad teeth."
"true and bad eyes too. i feel sad that i made bad products. however now that you are here i can send you with a message."
"what good is a message from a fool."
"i am not a fool i planned to make a good product i am wise but lacked the ability and strength. now bring my wise message."
i agreed if and only if he would provide me with a method for food.
***
"the creator light shined a light at me and explained when you drink water some will be the water you need and some will be the strength you need and you will not feel hunger. then everybody will know you bring my wise message."
***
the message was: a group of fairies had created a world of dirt for themselves. they made mountains and hills and the sea. they made a sky that glowed light during day and stopped at night so they could sleep. hoped to live there forever since they were eternal with no beginning because they were fairies. then they argued how to divide the land. one said "we should all live together as a group" the others said we should each live by ourselves and separated. the one who wanted the group named garry the fairy followed one lady fairy and said be my wife. she slapped him with her physical hand on his physical face. so gary was forced to live alone. i watched all this and decided to intervene.
first i made many burning hot stars and scattered them all around the first planet. then i made many more rocky planets and scattered them. i added water and rain to their world to make the fairies miserable and wet but they used fairy magic to drill holes in mountains and escaped the rain in caves. i had not thought of that possibility which would ruin my wise plan to cause them to work together and make gary happy."
"so you were wrong."
"my plan was wise but i didnot consider all the possibilities" god explained.
i promised to bring this message to my village.
god added, "never ever believe any other message of "forbidden laws" nor "prohibitions" nor "obligatory ceremonies" from any spiritual source nor any person claiming he is teaching any spiritual message because i am the only creator god and no such message will come from me. you will know they are lying". 
i promised to teach that too.
god continued "now i also make you immortal so you will never die and tell each generation of humans never to believe such messages."
i felt stronger.
god continued, "after i made stars and planets and after them the rain i added animals and later trees. any book with a different order is not from the creator light but a human guess and a wrong guess. so warn your people."
i promised and i had faith in the creator light who had a form but no body same as me at that time.
i knew they would believe me because they were primitive and even believed the impossible story of the sliced lion tiger mother.
i could tell them any story but i wanted my gift of hunger-less.
i awoke on the ledge. i started to doubt if that was only a dream because i had remembered jumping to try and kill myself. i checked my legs and i could walk and no pain si knew i must not yet have jumped. it must be the dawn of day 2. this time i did not try to bite grass so i did not cut the skin inside my mouth. in fact the cuts that i remembered were not in my mouth because i had not yet tried to chew the thin grass blades.
i recalled the bitter leaf and that they did not help my hunger anyway so i did not try to eat the leaf of the new tree. now i knew who made the tree it was the creator light. 
my next goal would be to eat breakfast but i had human teeth which were useless for eating both grass and animals. i had no solution so i waited for hunger and to jump again. true i had died too young but i had no other option so i waited for hunger. i was also thirsty so i drank. but when i drank... i felt very very strong. the dream must have been real. i used my strength to run across the plain in only two hours.
i told the villagers the message from the creator light and they all started worshipping the fairies to thank them for making the sea and the rivers and the rain. i tried to correct them, "the fairies made the dirt but the light made the rain" but they were primitive and confused and started arguing aboyt what i had said instead of asking me. 
i said "see that you need to eat but even if you gaaurd me i will never need to eat" but they were too busy arguing about what they thought i had said to ask me. i left the stupid humans and their false faiths most which would be refuted but a few lies would evolve into widely held sustems enforced by fear and violence. and fear fo the fire of hell.
i went back to my ledge and just thought about ideas. i felt bored so i walked to explore until one day i met a hungry lepird.
it had not eaten all night. all the days of my wandering i had only drank water from different rivers and never felt hungry nor needed to eat so i knew my dream was real not only a dream. also i had not been injured by my fall it was all real. who would be the students of the message? gods plan had been wise but he had not considered the possibility that the students would argue whhat i said instead of asking me.
i must find new students to obey god or else the deal would be cancelled and i would feel hungry suffering again from hunger.
when i saw the lepird i felt fear from the dangerous teeth and claws that could kill antlope and zebra. then i comforted myself i must not fear since the gift was true the message must be true and i am immortal i cannot die. so i fearlessly walked to the lepird it jumped on me and OWWW it bit my kneck that HURT very very much and all went dark. i awoke dawn of day 2. i felt my kneck but the lepird had not yet bitten until after my days of travel. now i knew i would not die of age but animals could kill me.
i ran in the direction of the lepird ready with my new plan. i reached the lepird and said "i will lead you to food." the lepird agreed not to eat the "tiny child snack" if i led him to big food.
i led him to my cave where my ma lived the one that yelled at me until i was forced like a slave to take stones from a cave. the lepird joyfully ate her. we lived in the cave. at night when i felt cold i would cuddle in the soft warm lepird fur.
i asked the lepird how did you get spots? it yawned.
each morning i ran to the water and drank and brought water for the lepird. but after only two days it was hungry. i noticed that my students were in a war killing each other i asked one why?
he said "our prophet named jesus said that there is only one god the father the son and the spirit but the other groups said that their prophet moses said many gods exist named vvishnu and brahma shiva and many more lesser gods and we must worship each one so we are trying to prevent them teaching false ideas by kiling them and they do the same.
that suited me for food for the lepird. each day i brought a corpse from the human wars nad listened to the faiths evolve in different directions... and each day that the lepird ate a corpse it did not eat me.
i had faced hunger but gd saved me from hunger.
i had died from a lepird not only in a dream but even when immortal too. but i had a chance to do day two again.
i had died from a fall but had a chance to do day two again.
i was free from pa who hit me with a branch because they killed him after i injured him. i was free from my ma due to the hungry lepird and my treaty to feed in exchange it wouldnot eat me.
when rain fell i was in the cave safe from the rain that god had made to make the fairies live together so gary the fairy would not be lonely. i did not need fire because i warmed myself with my lepird pal. 
only once humans ran into the cave to flee a battle and lepird at roared so the fled away from the lepird into the hands of the enemy tribe.
one fateful day larry the lepird died of old age. i started to feel lonely. i must teach the truth to somebody who would listen.
i prayed to the creator light to let me teach a student who was not primitive and god replied "you are immortal you will live long enough to meet inteligent humans but you must be patient and i will continue or treaty until then because i know you are sincere and you will teach it.
meanwhile tragedy struck.
after my pal larry the lepird died of old age many months past when people followe me back from the water but stopped at the cave due to the story of the lepird but one fateful day some wise guy who had evolved said "if he is not scared of the lepird then we should not either."
just in case the group of humans came with long spears with sharp pointy rocks on the wooden tip of the thick branches.
when they entered i had no lepird friend to scare them away. they said that they wanted the cave for when it rained i argued we could share it but they pushed me out of my cave.
now i would be in the rain.
i started to hate humans and i planned my revenge i used my energy to run far nad send hungry lions and tigers to that cave. sometimes the lions succeeded at killing some of the dwellers but in the end the group killed each beast. each day i went to a different place and sent different tigers and lepirds and lions and panthers. but they killed each one and brought reinforcement troops to gaurd the cave. i hated man for taking my cave and making an alliance to keep me away from my cave.
so i built the first house from stones. i built it near me energy supply of water. i udes mud to stick the rocks together. when rain fell from clouds the roof of long weeds protected the mud walls. i was still almost certain that probably invisible zebras moved the clouds. 
i feared people would chase me out of my new home. instead the other humans copied me and buuilt their own homes from rock and mud. they thatched the roof using long weeds. how had i known that mud would hold the rocks? a dream from the creator god.
he saw that they had chased and pushed me from my cave and despite being powerless and too weak to stop them he made the effort to teach me how to use mud to build a home and be protected from wind and rain.
generations passed with many deadly wars and battles for land and for opposing faiths and i wiated as generation after generation murdered itself and died of old age until finally in the year 2022 i met an inteligent person who did not ridicule my story.
until then people in the 1700's 1800's 1900's were either too scared to believe anything beside their holy book despite it containing prohibitions which as above were not from any god, nor the one real creator or  too skepticle beyond reasonable skepticism which would have been good if not overly skeptical.
finally i met a man who was willing to listen. we installed electrical cameras to prove i did not need to eat. from january 1, 2022 until february 1, 2022 i only drank water. each day we watched the video together and finally even skeptical ex-rabbi agreed to publish my story on his blog.
author's note: i saw that for weeks he did not need to eat because his experience and message were real . that is the only reason that i accept his message and publish in the hopes that you will know the truth about god and religious prohibitions and the correct order from the one who knew as above.
where is caveboy now? oh after he taught me and personnaly typed his story and message loyally to the creator god, and i helped him edit it so this generation could understand the message and together we negotiated the wording for the final publishing... after acomplishing his teaching mission he returned to live near different waterfalls.
the end.
conclusion one real prophet to replace them all.

caveboy with lepird chapter one zebra and pa

 caveboy with lepird
my legs were hurting. our group of men had been walking for a long time trying to find a big meaty animal to cookfor the group and wives. the bottom of my feet did not hurt. but the muscles in my legs did. pa yelled at me again to stay with the group but my child legs had smaller strides then each of the adults ten steps for them were much longer than my own in the same time and the strain was adding up.
for the first time in my life i "thought" something... how did other child legs stay with the group only MY pa was yelling at me! so i looked around and saw i was the only child in the group. 
i grunted to the man nearest me "where your son."
he grunted back "leg short."
hmm.
i stopped. again pa yelled at me to stay with group. i grunted "you must be like him young in cave."
pa grunted "i will hit you again".
again? i recalled how he got angry i did not know what i did wrong but he hot me.
i continued... thinking! staying mear a man who treated me different from other parents was bad. and in a way that caused me pain in my legs and painful hits that must stop and end.
i "decided" a decision for the first time ever. i must not stay near this man. 
i ran from the group and just ran and ran. 
soon i saw animals a group of white zebra with stripes like tigers on the white skin. the white was easy to see and i predicted they would soon end and never have any future for themseleves they could not hide. yet the man group had not found them.
i looked for a lady zebra. what was a lady zebra? the one with the tubes of milk. so i looked under each zebra and soon found one. i came near one at the edge of the group and it looked at me and laughed. it snorted in ridicule a real snort and i knew its ridicule "look at that little man so weak." the others snorted too. 
as i neared it it snorted "you cant scare me you lil man!" i put my mouth on the tube and sucked warm milk. my new "mam" ignored this and munched grass.
suddenly i heard a growl. for the first time EVER i thought about hunting. when WE man hunt we are silent but that DUMB animal just revealed its location! the zebra could flee and did! i oredicted the zebra could not hide and the lepird and man would eat them until none remained yet the dumb eaters would also end because they would warn the few that remained and die of hunger.
i was wrong. it growled because it KNEW it ran faster and could warn them and STILL CATCH THEM IN THE CHASE.
i discovered the zebra could not hide but it ran faster than me. my legs already ached so the lepird reached me first... chomp... i awoke in my cave. day one.
i was laying on the smooth part of a cave that i guessed a river had made, before the water ran away. i was shivering from cold. i looked at my ma and pa they had mammooth wool fur but only for themselves. not for me.
well they had fur all night now they should give me a "turn" to divide the time and use. i pulled the fur off my pa. he yelled at me and i grunted "my turn". he threatened to hit me again so i gave it back.
then he saw light at thhe end of the tunnel and grunted "we go hunt"
i argued grunting "small leg". he grabbbed a branch and walked toward me ready to hit me swinging the branch i remembered last time he waved the branch and i had then recalled the pain of the hit and grunted surrender... but NOT THIS TIME. i grabbed the nearest BIG stone and ran at his tall thick hairy muscular legs and aimed carefully SMACK the branch hit me over the shoulder and on my back and the pain BURNT but at the same time i gasped from pain he hollered too mt stone had at the same time slammed into his knee.
the branch dropped as pa swayed unable to balance on one leg. i could stop i had won VICTORY!! or... i again started thinking when HE hit me he did not stop just because i cried in pain. i must not stio when i hit him.
SMACK again my stone slammed into the same knee and this time the knee crunched.
his screams indicated pain the size of a mammoth!
he was getting the pain that he gave i repeatedly hammered the same injured place same as he hammered me with a branch. this was justice not revenge.
 ma was watching she swung her hands indicating she enjoyed watching her man in pain. i invented the word sadist for her because her name was sady.
i grunted "you are sadist".
she corrected me "wrong i sady not sadist."
i grunted "you both."
two man with long branches and sharp rocks tied on them entered before she could argue.
they grunted "where is dave/"
i pointed to pa. he was rolling on the floor crying showing great pain. i did not enjoy his suffering like my ma. i was not a sadist but i pressed my lips together in a line pain for pain is balance and justice.
a man grunted "he useless. no food." the pair jabbed the sharp spears into pa. i was shocked and surprised... i felt horror that they killed their own man... but i felt GREATER horror... i felt a feeling that i did not expect. my mind said "he deserved pain not death. killing THIS man was wrong" but me feelings said "joy relief nor more hits". obviously both were correct and the joy was stronger. also the pair was correct too. now that he could not hunt he was eating without giving so that was not justice. then a new thought "i had indirectly caused his death." still that man staying a live was impossible so no other option.
meanwhile the pair was looking back and forth at each other and at my ma.
the man named irg grunted "she lonely." the man named ing grunted "we can share her." 
irg grunted i will gard the opening and then we take turns. ing grunted agreement and that he would "just be a minute."
i laughed... for the first time ever... the first ever private joke. yes he would be finished very soon.
he grunted at ma "you alone." she uncovered herself sliding down the fur belt. he was closer than close. and ma said "i always wanted you more than dave."
he ignored her and just moved like jumping while they stood. i counted the jumps at fifteen i stopped.
ma grunted "you not real man."
anyway it was time to switch. ing pulled his fur belt on and walked to the opening. he saw a man walking near and said "we are waiting for dave." the man outside left away. irg uncovered his belt and grunted "my turn" my ma said "i hope you more time i only started."
i was shocked she had not grunted!
that is why i could THINK.
ma was the first true human she could speak but not think. i had evolved beyond her and i COULD.
when irg was finished ma was angry. as he turned away she swung the sharp stone... the same sharp stone that she used for cutting mammoth muscle at irg's kneck. she had waited to surprise him. the stone cut into his neck... she had knifed his neck! again i felt horror but not at his death at my "joy for a meal". i felt horror that i felt that. 
another man named gir came to the opening. "you must join hunt."
ing grunted "i can share. we share food." he ppointed at pa. the two man hid in the cave for some time. the other hunters had left away so the pair carried pa to their cave and probably ate breakfast with no need to hunt mammoth.
meanwhile ma made a fire and cut irg to peices and roasted him over the fire for herself. when sshe was finished cooking she started biting and i grunted "give me.'
she grunted "i cook i eat you no cook you no eat." i felt so angry i needed to call her a mean word but i never heard a mean word so i invented one "BITCH". she shrugged not recognizing the word and enjoyed her cooke man muscle.
she teased "you can eat man man." and pointed at the part that ma did not have. i was hungry so i took the long chunk and held it over the fire the first roasted hotdog.
ma copied my laugn and grunted "lil man ate man man ha ha!"
i argued "no waste food."
when we finished eating ma said "many rock you clean cave."
i argued "cave can have rock."
ma grunted and started yelling in an awful scream "clean cave." i refused so she screamed and hollered and yelled the noise was so annoying and for very long time i surrendered. i lifted two rocks. she held the long hunting spear ready in case i would use the stones against her in revenge for making me clean. she had thought? no just survival instinct.
she did not deserve pain. still she must not live and continue making me clean rocks. because caves can have rocks because it is a cave!
when i carried the rocks out i continued walking away and decide not to return to that evil slave lady. so i walked into the woods.
to be continued.

wonderland, 6 by carol, edited by n. tal

continued from

https://thinkforyourselfn8.blogspot.com/2022/02/abridged-version-of-wonderland-5-by.html

Pepper, pig and Cheshire cat 6

while Alice was nearing the house, suddenly someone came running out of the woods. his face was like a fish. his knuckles knocked loudly on the door. the door swung open revealing somebody with a round face, and large eyes like a frog. loud noises and crashes came from the open door. both fish and frog had powdered hair that curled all over their heads. She felt very curious to know why fish came running. she silently crept a bit nearer to listen. Fish pulled a paper from under his arm. it opened nearly as large as himself. he handed it to frog. Fish said “For the Duchess. An invitation from the Queen to play croquet.” Frog repeated, only changing the order of the words, “From the Queen. An invitation for the Duchess to play croquet.” Then they both bowed low, and their curls got entangled together. at this, Alice laughed so much that she worried they might hear so she needed to hide so she ran back into the woods. 

later she looked and saw that frog was alone sitting on the dull block pavement near the door, staring stupidly up at the sky. Alice went to the door and knocked. frog objected, "you should not knock, because, two reasons. First, they’re making such a noise inside, that they cannot possibly hear you, secondly, I’m on the same side of the door as you are.” a very loud noise was inside: a continuous howling. Also great crashes repeated. Alice thought it sounded like a clay dish broke into many pieces. 

She asked Frog, “Please, how can I get in?” He was still looking up and said to her, “I will sit here till..." At this moment, the door of the house opened, and a large plate flew out. it was flying straight and hit the edge of frog's nose. when the broad flying saucer hit a tree it broke. Frog continued in the same

tone, “...tomorrow or next day, maybe,” His tone was exactly as if nothing had happened. Alice looked at the door that had opened but saw, same as the low door that she had unlocked, was now closed again, ergo she repeated again, but this time in a louder tone, “How can I get in?”

“Will you get in?” frog asked her. she replied, "Your arguing is really dreadful,” remembering how he was like many creatures here who had argued. frog began whistling, so "she pushed opened the door" and went in.

She stood in a wide kitchen that was full of smoke. the short and ugly Duchess was sitting on a three-legged stool and held a baby. the Cook was by the fire, stirring something in a huge pot. “There’s certainly too much pepper in that soup,” Alice told the duchess while sneezing. too much of it was in the air, too, but the cook did not sneeze. the Duchess also sneezed, but the baby was sneezing and waaing alternately without a pause. The only things in the kitchen that did not sneeze were the pots! a large cat was sitting and grinning. Alice asked, a little timidly, “Please tell me, why your cat grins like that?” Alice felt very happy to start a conversation.

“It’s a Cheshire cat,”  answered the Duchess, “and that’s why. Pig!” She said the last word harshly, to the baby, and not to Alice, who commented, “I didn’t know that cats could grin.” Duchess argued, “They all can, and most do.” Alice replied, very politely, “I don’t know any that grin,” while remembering her pet cat. Duchess argued, “You don’t know much, and that’s a fact.” Alice stopped the conversation at this insult.  The cook took the soup off the fire, and began throwing everything she could reach at the Duchess and the baby. first came some items, then followed a shower of pots, and dishes. The Duchess ignored them even when they hit her. the baby was crying so much already, that

Alice could not tell whether it noticed the hits or not. Alice protested to the cook, "STOP hurting him!" because it must hurt, like when a baby starts crying before a circumcision and continues crying when they cut a piece off. Alice felt relieved that her family like most brits have abandoned that cruel tradition. Then Alice begged the cook, “Oh, please stop that!”, jumping repeatedly in an agony of terror for the injury of the delicate and helpless baby. an unusually large pot flew close by him, adding to Alice's fear that he would get injured. the Duchess growled, “If everybody stopped talking about other's actions, and focussed only of their own, the world would be better." Alice asked, "How?" Duchess explained, "It would spin faster than it does!" Alice argued, “Which would not be better, it would change the day and the night.  the earth spins around on its axis..."

“About axes,” interrupted the Duchess, “chop off her head!” Alice felt anxious, and looked toward the cook, who had already acted violently, to see if she took a knife to obey the duchess or not.  She was stirring soup, and seemed to ignore her command. Alice continued, "A day is 24 hours, or is it twelve?” she replied, “Oh, don’t bother me, I hate numbers.” she began shaking "her son". She sang but  Alice could hardly hear the words over his crying. duchess added a strong shake at the end of every line: “I always SHOUT at my young boy.

 I shake him when he sneezes.

He only does it to annoy, Because he knows it teases.” then the cook and the baby joined: "Waa Waa Waa!” While the Duchess sang the second part of the poem, she was repeatedly tossing the baby up, every time it fell down.. “I always SHOUT at my young boy,  I shake him when he sneezes.

For he can thoroughly enjoy, The pepper when he pleases!” They CHORUSsed, “Waa Waa Waa!” After the poem The duchess handed him to Alice, saying, “rock it while I get ready to play croquet with the Queen.” she hurried out of the room. The cook threw a frying-pan at her as she went out. it missed her but almost hit her. when Alice held him his arms and legs swung in all directions. he stopped crying but started snorting like a steam-engine. 

pig and cheshire

intro: the baby changed into a pig so she freed it. the cheshire cat directed her to a house shaped like a rabbit so she adjusted her height.

she sat with the mad hatter and the march hare but they annoyed her so she left. she entered a door in a tree and returned to the hall with the low door. now with mushroom she took the key and entered the garden. she played a game with the queen.

she talked to amazing creatures: a lion-bird blend and a cow turtle blend. gryphon led her to the court where she saw the duchess and mad hatter again. the j of hearts again stole the tarts and gave one to alice. she ate it and it caused her to return to her sister.

Alice watched the grinning cat, so she recited a cat poem "While i was combing my blond hair,

I saw a cat who was not there,

again it was not there today..." alice paused for the conclusion, raising her right hand and showing the number of fingers: "I wish 4 [for] it 2 [to] go away."  it replied, "I will go away now but you will see me again!" Alice watched the cat raise its tail up high. surprizingly the tail changed as its end vanished and the tail was becoming shorter and shorter... then the cats back shortened and its back legs vanished, as it started floating! its front feet were still curled under its chest like sitting but amazingly on air until those also vanished! soon its kneck also vanished and its triangle ears until all that remained was a floating grin. it floated  toward a glass window which its invisible paw pushed open. it left, leaving the window open, in case alice would DOUBT maybe nothing had really happened. 

she held him properly by tightly pressing right arm with left foot, ending their swinging and waving. she carried it out from the short home. It stopped sneezing. she noticed frog was not there despite his plan to sit by the door all day. Had he ever been by the door? 

She worried that the duchess would be mad that she took baby away, but decided to rescue it from the danger of flying saucers and pots. She reasoned: leaving it in danger would be worse. it grunted its last grunt and stopped. Alice looked closely at its face, for the first time. she saw its nose was much more like a snout than a baby nose. She was watching its eyes which were getting extremely small even for a tiny baby.  Alice decided it looked ugly. She reconsidered, maybe this was only caused by sobbing, Now were no more tears. she carried it and walked awhile silently Alice looked at its face and felt alarmed that she was holding a pig. Exactly a pig, no more nor less. she set the duchess's baby son pig down on the dirt. it quietly trotted away, causing her to feel relief. It WAS ugly for a child, but for pigs, it was a handsome one. Alice recalled some boys and began thinking they might be handsome if they were pigs. 

She noticed something and felt a bit startled.

Cheshire

Alice saw Cheshire Cat sitting on a tree branch and grinning. It had very long claws and sharp teeth, so she timidly began, “Cheshire, how can i get taller?"

“That depends on how big you want." Alice asked herself, "Maybe my natural height?" She answered Alice, "i might scare the duchess [her house was four feet tall], so only a LITTLE bigger." it argued, "you can't be little AND bigger!" Alice felt too shocked to answer that she had meant a bit bigger. finally she asked, "tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?” it grinned a little wider saying, “That depends on where you want to get to,” when she said, “I don’t care where,” it replied, “Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,” . Somebody said, “that way,” it was the Cheshire Cat, continuing and pointing its right paw to her right side [credit disney], “lives a Hatter." Then it pointed the other paw the other way and concluded, ”and that way lives a March Hare. they’re both mad.”

"I don’t want to go to crazy people,” Alice responded. it argued, "if so, then do not visit both, instead visit one, either one you choose." She explained, "I don’t want to go to anyone crazy." it clarified, "Oh, you can’t avoid that, everyone here is mad. I’m mad. You’re mad we’re all mad.” Alice asked, “why do you say I’m mad?” it proved, "You are also here therefore you must be, Everyone here is mad.” Alice didn’t think that proved it at all. She had come here following a rabbit. While she was thinking it continued, "I know i am mad because some dogs are mad dogs therefore OTHER dogs are not mad." She nodded agreeing to the logic. it continued, "I am not a dog therefore i must be mad."  Alice agreed, “I suppose so.” 

"However, how can i be certain i am NOT a dog?" She did not doubt that, but could not think of any difference between cats and dogs. it continued, "I growl when I’m pleased, but a dog only wags its tail when it is pleased but does not growl, so I must be mad.” alice argued, “I call it purring, not growling." next alice agreed, "your ears are like triangles so you are not a dog." Alice argued again, "The March hare is NOT mad because now is May." It argued, "since it is here it must be mad," and vanished. Alice had seen that before so she was not surprised. she was getting used to strange things happening. it suddenly appeared again, and asked, “what about the baby?”

“It turned into a pig,” Alice answered in a tone as if the cat appearing was natural and a son changing to a pig was too. it said, “I thought he would change into a fig, and i was right,” and vanished again. She corrected it, “I said pig,” She heard its voice, "a pig, that is obvious." she complained, "I wish you wouldn’t suddenly vanish." It instantly reappeared and this time it vanished quite slowly, "beginning with the end" of its tail, and ending with the grin, which remained a few moments after the rest vanished. she told it, "I’ve often seen a cat without a grin, but a grin without a cat! that is new."

she walked toward the March Hare, since she had seen hatters before.  She reasoned even if it is mad, it won’t be as mad now as it was in March. She came to the house of the March Hare. its chimneys were shaped like long rabbit ears. its fur roof was thatched with fur. It was a big house so she nibbled some of the left-hand bit of mushroom until she grew up to two feet high.  she walked towards it and saw a long table on the grass.

SEVEN Mad Tea Party 

On green grass, in front of the house,

a table was under a tree.

the dormouse and the mad Hatter

and the March Hare, were sipping tea.

NOTE: continued in chapter seven tea.

https://thinkforyourselfn8.blogspot.com/2022/03/wonderland-7-tea-by-carol-edited-by-n.html

there.

abridged version of "wonderland", 5, by carol edited by n. tal

continued from

https://thinkforyourselfn8.blogspot.com/2022/02/abridged-version-of-wonderland-4-by.html

5 Advice from a Caterpillar

  The Caterpillar and Alice looked at each other silently, until it asked in a sleepy voice, "Who are YOU?'
Alice answered shyly, `I... I do not know that. at least I know who I WAS until I changed.`
  `What do you mean?' it asked, `Explain yourself.'
  `I can't explain MYSELF,' she replied, `because I'm not myself, you see.'
  `I DON'T,' it said abruptly. Alice responded very politely, `I can't remember poems as before. changing many different sizes in a day is very confusing.'
  `It isn't,' the Caterpillar argued very briefly.
  `you have not yet felt it,' commented Alice; `but when you will change into a butterfly, you'll feel strange same as that would feel strange to ME.'
  `You!'  it exclaimed, `Who are YOU?' returning to the beginning of the conversation, so she turned and walked away. It called after her, `Come back! What size do you WANT to be?' .
 "I want to be a LITTLE taller," answered Alice: `three inches is too small.'
  `That height is VERY good,' it exclaimed angrily. it bent up so she saw that they were exactly the same height. it added "the mushroom will change your size." Then it crawled down off the mushroom, and thru the grass. She guessed its bottom would shrink her down, but its top would lengthen her. she doubted maybe a mushroom only causes mushrooming. Before she broke any off, to be a bit taller, she heard a voice. somebody said, `One side will shorten you, but the other side will lengthen you.' Alice was looking thoughtfully at the perfectly round mushroom, trying to see which were its two sides. After thinking, she stretched her arms around it, and broke off a bit of the edge from opposite sides. she wondered, `which is which?' She swallowed some from her right hand. Instantly, she felt her chin hit her foot. [she had shrunk and two hebrew letters in "right" are same in the word meaning "low"]. Next, she moved her left hand with some mushroom but opening her mouth was difficult, because her chin was pressed closely against her foot. she managed to swallow a bit and suddenly lengthened taller. She realized that the letters in the word "tall" t, and l, are more similar to "left" than to "right" only "t" one common letter. Now, she felt delight until she looked to her shoulders and found that they were not found. She felt frightened. She looked down and saw a long neck, rising up from a rug of green leaves. She moved her hands, but also could not find them nor the mushroom in them. She asked her hands, "WHERE are you?' 
 She lowered her head down toward the leaves. her neck easily zigged and zagged like the curves of a sliding snake, until it gracefully folded so her head was by the tops of the trees. a large pigeon flew and its wings started hitting her face violently. it shrieked, `Serpent!'
  `I'm NOT a serpent!' said Alice `Stop.' it stopped hitting her and complained `I've tried dwelling on the roots of trees, and I've tried bushes but serpents come." Alice asked, `What do you mean?"
  "I must look for serpents night and day. I tried the highest tree but you come down from the sky!' it concluded.
  `But I'm NOT a serpent!' exclaimed Alice before doubtfully adding `I'm a, I'm a little girl." It asked, "Have you ever eaten an egg?'
"because GIRLS eat eggs and i am one." insisted Alice. 
"if so," it argued, "then girls are a type of serpent." This new idea caused her to remain silent. It concluded, `You're looking for eggs, whether you're a girl or a serpent.' 
 "I'm not! I don't like them raw.'
  `if so, go away' it said, as it sat down again into its nest. 
Alice lowered her head between trees but her neck kept getting entangled among the branches. repeatedly she stopd to free it. 
Under the branches she tried to shrink to her usual size, by first very carefully nibbling at the piece of mushroom in her right hand, and quickly from the other. She changed sometimes taller and sometimes shorter, until she succeeded. Even her usual size felt strange because such a long time had passed since she had been her usual size. However, in a few minutes she felt herself. She had accomplished half the plan. the next goal was to go into that beautiful garden, so she walked under the branches to search for it. 
she came to a house about four feet high. Its door was nine inches high. Alice imagined whoever lives in it would be scared if she appeared THIS size, so she again began nibbling the righthand bit, until she shrunk to the same height as the door, before going near the house. 
end 5

Alice met the fish face and the frog face. she visited  the duchess, who gave her a crying baby. the baby changed into a pig so she freed it. the cheshire cat directed her to a house shaped like a rabbit so she adjusted her height.

she sat with the mad hatter and the march hare but they annoyed her so she left. she entered a door in a tree and returned to the hall with the low door. now with mushroom she took the key and entered the garden.

she talked to amazing creatures: a lion-bird blend and a cow turtle blend.

she played a game with the queen. she went to the court where she saw the duchess and mad hatter again. the j of hearts again stole the tarts and gave one to alice. she ate it and it caused her to return to her sister.

continued at

https://thinkforyourselfn8.blogspot.com/2022/02/wonderland-6-pepper-by-carol-edited-by.html

some SHOCKING story

some SHOCKING story
DISCLAIMER: this story is based on a true story therefore i needed to wait to get permission from the students to use their shocking stories and some specified i can use their actual names since they do not regret what they did however i will change their names anyway.
THE JANITOR chapter one
so you dont believe that young kids actually sleep with each other? tv shows teens in bed together acting out like they are "doing intimacy" before age 18, for example donnie darko and more, but that is only fiction right?
truth is important although truly MOST FEMALE MINORS do not want that kind of intimacy yet or know the risk is too great so restrain their desire i had the opportunity to meet the "desparate duo."
rarely VERY young girls want that kind of intimacy so much that they threatened me into doing it.
i will not detail here what i did age five with older girls just mention that one was so desperate that she threatened me to "plug in the power plug or else she would pinch me".
however what i did as a minor is long gone what about what i did s an adult?
in january 2010 i was studying computer technician. i was working as a janitor. one fateful day in january the boss sent me to replace a janitor who was sick with flu virus. so i went to a school. at the gate , for in israel unfortunately schools need high fences and gaurds to keep out physical danger from muslim terrorists that have already tried to shoot and bomb jewish schools as well as the more recent threat from sexual criminals, 
so when a man, me, came to the gate the guard hesitated to let me enter. "you are not the janotor dont lie i know the janitor."
i tried to argeu "did he come? i am his replacement."
"liar" he replied. so i called the clean compan who called the principal who called the gard who finally unlocked the gate.
when i went to the principal to hear my work assignment i asked if he wanted substitute teachers or tutors.
he said "not here but in ashdod a school is DESPARATE to replace some rotten awful teachers but cannot find replacements so they begged him to send them "even the worst" one at this school. this principal also could not find replacements so he kept even the dreadful [in hebrew norahee] ones. therefore i should try to get the job in ashdod they would be desperate to take "even you." meaning with zero class room experience.
i agreed since working with brats was way better then working with gross dirt and mud and filthy floors and smelly odorous trash cans.
immediately  he phoned the school and notified them he would send an inexperienced janitor if they were desperate. by phone i spoke to the principal and he was desperate so we arranged a job interview. he told the "principal where i was cleaning" to give the money for travel which he would "gladly pay you for on tuesday" as in the popeye carttoon by fleischer.
then i went to the clean the filthy school.
after arranging vacation from the cleaning job whic needed me until the end of the week and allowing me sunday free, i traveled to ashdod to the two job interviews.
+another school gard chapter 2
first i went to one of the many secular schools where i was shocked at how often the kids talked about intimacy and intimate body parts.
before i entered, again i needed to "get past the gard". this gard also called me a liar and said get out or else he would report me to the principal. "good call him he is the one who arranged my interview,"
the jerk argued vehemently that he does not need to call anyone and refused to let me enter.
so i called the number i had and a lady answered. "hi, blank speaking..." she interrupted in her shrill feminine voice "i cant talk now" switched off the phone. so i wrote a text message "i came for my interview."
"i told you you were a liar the principal does not let you in now get away or i will tel the cops another child pervert refuses to leave the school."
because i was innocent i had nothing to fear, so i waited for her to phone me back, but a full tense minute later of the gard yelling at me, to leave and that the cops were coming, she had not!
luckily cops respond slow and i had a few minutes before the patrol came. i tried again and she had seen  the message and said "let me talk to the gard." i handed him the phone and he pressed "off". then he lied she never let you in.
behind me i heard the siren... tension mounted and the phone on his desk rang. he smiled smugly and said "you keep away from our kids thay get molested too much already!"
the cops two in a pair were running from their vehicle to block my escape... the SUSPENSE was palpable and tangible!
hs phone rang and rang and the cops neared...
finally my cellular rang and the principal said "hand the phone to the cops" she had seen on the closed circuit security camera. 
"dont resist pervert" hollered the male cop his chin dark despite shaving. "the manager" i said in hebrew waving the cell phone at the lady cop. she took my phone and said "we got him this time." and switched off the phone! it rang again and she answered "let him go?? why?" pause.
the angry male froze holding the metal cuffs when he heard that. he glared at me as angry as if i had already raped a girl.
she returned my cel phone and said "he has an interview so write him up for false alarm." the angry cop hissed "hands". the lady said "no just write." the angry impatient cop turned red at the missed chance to cuff someone, both of us.
even innocent need to fear impatient cops.
he wrote a ticket for the false alarm. the tactless gard argued with the cop "its my authority and my job not to let perverts in." so they photographed him and warned if he didnot pay he would pay much more.
the cops left. the lady cop bothered to apologize and the male cop yelled at her "stop showing weakness the criminals can smell weakness".
jeez what a society.
after the cops walked away the gard locked the gate and escorted me warning me in angry tone not to touch those poor kids he repeated it a second time indicating that he was hidinhg his OWN actions.
but nobody would believe me that this repitiion was suspicious... until... i passed a kid in the corridor he said to me, the single janotor, "he touches us that sicko." the gard repeated "liar" and led me to the office.
in the office mr. crab warned the gard that he MUST ANSWER the gard phone and he would face discipline for ignoring the phone and causing a police issue.
the tactless gard argued "i dont care it is the school fine"
"you will personally pay the fine." insisted mr. crab "for not answering the security line."
i added "i suspect him of touching the children."
mr. crab was evidently extra crabby that day and believed me. he immediately typed something and printed the prepared page. "fired for criminal conduct" and handed a copy from the printer to the gard.
"you cant do this i will burn your house" hollered the gard like a mob gang.
crab pulled his pepper spray and aimed. the ex-gard fled.
+first grade brats chpter 3 
i left mr. crab's office and saw the kids were in the hallway by their metal lockers swapping books for classes. the principals sent me to teach as substitute to see if i could handle the small group.
in 2010 those brats were age six in first grade. now in 2022 they can give permission and did.
i was sent to the small group of "weaker" students. first graders who needed extra practice in math from the common forty kid classrooms my group were the selected 8 of the weakest students.
what were my teaching materials?
the general principal mr. crab, sent me to the academic principal mrs. baygwyn. she had married the relative of the famous politician "begin pronounced bay+ghin" but he was ashamed of his politics and war activities so changed his name, not to "gay+bin" which would attract ridicule but to baygwyn before the wedding when she took her husband name instead of her family name.
she sent me to the "record room" a huge room with many long rows of metal filing cabinets. the metal drawerhad yellow folders with math papers. the lesson for january was in the january drawer so i found the weeks folders. i started taking 8 papers from each of five folders but had a problem 2 flders had less than 8!
i returned to baygwyn and she instructed me to "copy the missing ones and insure at least one of each remained in the folder." so i obeyed her and with school approval made copies. i had emptied three of the folders which had 8 or less so i checked which and made a copy of those lessons so that each folder had at least one original remaining for future years in adition to copies completing the forty for that week.
i placed four days worth of 8 papers each in the classroom file cabinet and locked it by pressing the lock in.
then she told the brats that they better obey the substitute or else. she left me with 8 bratty six year olds.
i announced "we will practice addition"
a girl yelled "we did it yesterday already" despite the day was sunday!
another girl yelled in hebrew "2 boys with pin [hebrew peeneem meaning pins] plus one girl with zero peeneem is three kids." the boy corrected her "only two kuz girls dont have a stem "ukitz". another boy added "four eggs two for each boy".
that made all the brats giggle. i was SHOCKED. when i was in first grade we never spoke like that.
i was flooded with possible responses to correct the errors or yell at them for bad words or praise the addition?
instead i focusd on the job. i walked to each desk and lay a paper on it explaining "write the answer and we will review."
the desks were two rows of four and the girl and boy on the edge near the window started reading the numbers silently and counting on their fingers. i almost breathed with relief as i lay the papers on the next two desks and then the next two desks and then felt  the attack not any pain just surprise...
someone not named david... he did not permit me to say his name just his story, had stood BEHIND me and had pushed the fabric of my pants between the muscular melons at the "bottom" of my back.
as i turned he waved his hand and teased "iks! now my hand is stinky". all the brats laughed and two boys almost fel off their chairs.
i turned to face him in horror trying to think of something to say but only stammered the start of the word manager "min, min" i stammered in shock not pain but surprise.
a girl yelled a rhyme "he is min min from china" which rhymes in hebrew minmin from "sin" meaning china.
the boy teased another rhyme "no believing what you will say min min" in hebrew "maamin" rhymes.
i finally thought of what to say. "we must not touch that way."

Another girl sneered "we? you will touch us!"

"no!" i denied, "i am not like that."

dave teased again "you think that was bad..."
another brat interrupted saying "he did not hit you".
the first not named dave continued "gard bleep grabbed me HERE" and he pushed his little first grade palm on the intimate part of my [ants and then slid his hand sideways... i was too surprised to hide my moan of pleasure.
somebody said "he did not hurt you" but i was distracted.
when dave released and stepped back i knew what to say, "he got fired" i blurted out. in hebrew "hu mfutar."
dave almost smiled "liar". 
" i caused this today."
"if that is true i will give you a muffin tomorow" said dave retreating to his chair and opening his pack to find a muffin. somebody said "if that is true i will give you MORE than a muffin". it was a boy who had not yet got his math paper.
a little girl brazenly explained "he means the pleasure of orgasm" in hebrew orgazma. i almost stopped my heart beat hearing her talk about intimacy so brazenly. she wrote me permission to say her name now that she is 18 because she does not regret it and today seems like a great funny story but her name was not dvora. back to the classroom, "she is right" said the same boy not named beryl.

mary said "what do you mean you are not like that?"

"i do not touch those places." i explained. then another girl teased "only if you lack a stem"

dave corrected her "he has ukitz i felt it" while dave was waving the plastic muffin package that once held a muffin to show he was not lying about his gratitude.
evrrybody but me giggled.
i silently gave the last papers and repeated "write the answers and we will review them." 
suddenly the atmosphere in the room changed i could sense all the teasing ended and i looked at the door mrs. baygwyn was looking in the window to check if i was touching the kids so they pretended to write the answers.
when she left the window a kid, not named katy, although she gave permission to use her real name,  said "you better not touch me. i brought a metal pen today." and she waved it.
"i am not like that." i tried to calm the traumatized victims.
"no stem" in hebrew ukitz teased dvora.
dave corected her "i felt it he has ukitz".
"and its poking out now" teased katy pointing.
somebody teased "he loves dave he loves dave."
"no. it response. now get to work."
suddenly they were writing and i looked at the window. baygwyn had peeked in again. she opened the door and said "i am pleasantly surprised to see they are actually writing. very impressive mr. bleep."
then to the brats. "katy please read number one."
" i need to go number one" said dave.
"not now" said the principal. 
"i dont really have too" added dave.
katy read "six plus seven is 13."
"correct" i said.
"wrong" said the principal
"twelve?" guessed katy.
dvora in a serious tone "after seven is 8," she raised a finger, "9 10 11 12 13." she concluded.
katy argued "six was first"
"choose the larger" i said.
bayggwyn said "only dvora gave the correct answer not katy. now dave read number two."
"i gotta go number two" said tommy. 
"go," said baygwyn.
"i dont really need to go." added tommy.
she checked the answers and every sample was correct except one kid changed the answer when we reviewed.
after we had reviewed the ten addition, baygwyn said "crab is so impressed that he wants you to stay the full hour for salary so tel the kids a story from the religious bible."
"tell us about onan" said dave. i could hardly breathe.
"who?" asked baygwyn.
"josef saw dreams..." i started.
a shrill feminine voice whined " we heard that one already"
"shh" the class chorussed so i could continue the story.
baygwynn left. "he saw bundles of grain surrounding his bundle and they bowed down to his bundle."
"to him," corrected dave.
i ignored him to continue, "he told the dream to his brothers [as the bible story not the original boring story before rabbis corrupted to add excitement of false BETRAYAL and other evil elements to falsely blame the VIRTUOUS BROTHERS.] "they hated josef, i continued the bible story. 
"i hate gard bleep" said dave, "i wanna push him in a pit of scorpions" 
"yay" the class chorused.
i continued the story until crab interrupted "thanks for the hour. were their any incidents?" 
"he is the first one to believe us about gard bleep." said dave who had planned to get my attention as above.
"if he believed you then i believe you we fired him today." said crab.
then to me "come back after lunch for the older kids."
i had traveled by train from six until almost nine and taught from around 1030 to 1130. so i had time before lunch i walked a few blocks to the other school interview hoping that place was calmer." i understood dave had only attacked me to show how awful the gard was. 
+ the religious school chapter 4
at the other school the kids were eating lunch so the corridor was empty i sat by the religious principal who i must hide his name and his school.
"which school did you teach at before?" asked rabbi not named raisin.
"none"
"good" said raisin "i dont want past trauma here."
well too late for THAT. i thought to myself.
"i only have one question." said raisin and paused.
"i know bible stories and religious talmud."
"no not that anybody can prepare a lesson. will you FLICK the brats when they need it?"
"flick? no i never smack." i replied waving my hand in a smack motion.
"no not smack just a small flick" and he smacked his own face loudly.
"no sir. i dont do that."
"i need someone who flick them when they need it."
"no. i will use other punishments.'
"then leave."
"but i passed your test."
"no test i need someone who will flick."
i started walking to the door certain this was just a test... but he did not stop me. at the door i turned and said "you want me to say i will flick or else i dont get paid".
"no, i alrady decided no flick no job."
i judge his as guilty. so i cannot say his real name nor do i even remeber now 12 years later who nor which religious school in ashdod only that he was obeying the jewish rabbi books "must hit students" which now is crime, but the law is not enforced.
i went back to the first school. and that was when the WORSE shock happened.
+the threat chapter 5
warning this is a traumatizing story so parental disgression required.
but hey everybody reads the bible about genesis and dina... and the mass murder in genesis and other traumatizing horrible stories in the holy bible... only to make the story exciting but children believe they occurred and so do some militarist i mean literalist teachers and rabbis.
as i walked down the crowded corridor a group of three girls was moving extra slow toward me in a suspicious way... while others rushed to class as the girl nearest me passed... i hear a click... and felt my knee... something pressed just above my left knee.'
i looked down and saw the stapler.
she handed me a folded note and ran with her pals to class.
the "ransome note" warned. "this time the stapler was empty but if you arenot by the door to follow my instructions at 2 pm.
i continued reading the typed hebrew words. "be at the door of the library at 2pm"
i was curious and feared the threat it coulda been loaded and i already would have sufferd. i cant block a sneaky stapler.
the class was cancelled so i prepared for the 3 oclock math class of fifth graders. at 2 i walked to the door of the library and entered.
the girl, who gave permission to use her real name for educational purposes, but not named doris, was watching by the door of the toilet as i stood by the library, which was dark and unused.
i entered the library and doris followed with her stapler. i knew this time it was loaded what could she possibly want? she looked like first grade barely six years old.' she wore a dress pale orange reaching her knees. 
"i am not like that you dont need the stapler" i urged. 
"ken ani ken" she argued meaning yes i yes or yes i do.
"bend down so i can tell you a secret"
i obeyed my terrorist.
as i leaned forward her hand grabbed the tube. and she whispered "from this morning i felt i needed you."
i tried to talk but the pressure on the tube was too distracting.
"i want you to put this" she pushed hrder on my tube, "in me."
the pressure lessend and i said "it will hurt, you are six!"
"i am seven and i use a dildo but when i saw YOU it is not enough."
"the pressure increased but not yet a painful pinch. she continued to whisper "you are in my hand either pain or pleasure."
i tried to say yes but the pleasure was too intense to speak. i nodded and tried "k k" i gagged.
then she started "petting the cat spine" as she instructed "in ten minutes you will leave the school turn left and walk until the bank leumi. i will follow. in the bank sit and i will pass you to go to the men toilet. you will follow and knock the code. if i answer the code count to twenty and open the door if not go back for a minute and repeat." i nodded as she continued petting the cat.
"tell me when the seed is about to come out and i will stop." said the seven year old. i said "no need i will obey."
"ken ata ken" she argued meaning yes you do.
i was too distracted to think about what she was doing until she paused and hugged me very tight. her arms reached behind my shirt and her chest bone pressed hard on the hard tube.
pressing less tight and tighter and up and repeat " akshab" i whispered thinking she would stop but then she accelerated the pace and... you know what happens when men rub.
she whispered "i feel the pump" mashayva in hebrew. and continued repeating until the pump emptied.
"ten minutes" she repeated and lifted the stapler.
i considered my options if i fled she could tell the truth about our hug and i would be in HUGE trouble or i could stay in school and get my knee stapled or i could find out how "far" she wanted me to go?
she claimed to use a dildo? she was certainly lying... wasnt she? she was probably lying... wasnt she?
i went to the door. my class did not start until 3. nobody would notice and i could say i went to the bank.
on schedule she was at the edge of the corridor. watching the door wearing her backpack.
she was serious. i decided i cant work in ashdod.
i walked obediently to the bank without looking behind me. i entered the bank and sat on a hard wood bench. the workers were too busy to notice me busy with customers or rushing from one job to the next. they cannot be blamed for what doris planned. i can hardly be blamed.
doris entered the bank and passed me i watched her to learn where the toilet was. again i had a chance to run but she could tell the truth that we hugged. she had planned too well. and i honestly wanted to know how far she would go.
when i was five, i had slept with curious third grade girls age seven but never as an adult.
i honestly felt more curious than threatened but had the excuse of blackmail for society.
i followed as busy bees flowed around me from task to task... and reached the toilet marked male. a guy in a suit and tie said "only use man room" sadly they needed to specify that. the door had a sign adding further exclusion "only for men" the same as the sign at the bus station. i pointed to the sign and knocked. the guy watched me and when he heard a knock back he left.
i remembered to count to twenty then opened the unlocked door. she was standing. her dress on as i had hoped. but i had doubted. i locked the door and stood a safe distance from her stapler. i whispered "no dildo correct?" but she was prepared. she was standing ON the toilet seat and waved an adult dildo. it was the first time in my life that i saw one. i had never seen one on tv nor porn nor in those shops.
i emphasize she wrote permission to tell this story and say her real name for educational purposes rarely some girls want at a young age.
we must not hurt them when they do not want. most do not want and even if they do only when they are prepared. but i knew biblical holy isac slept with his wife rebeka when she was age three years that is why REBECCA parents said in holy bible  "wait a few months" at least three and half as the rabbis explained and when isac did not delay he is still considered holy. so i can be like holy isac. in fact age seven was DOUBLE. i saw actions of consent not merely words.
"take the towel from my bag and dry your seed." she instructed.
i obeyed and cleaned the sticky jelly.
put oil on this. "she handed me the dildo. so i took baby oil from her pack and oiled it and she shoved it under her dress and with the other hand lifted her dress, standing on the toilet seat to show me she was not lying.
i was suprised by my reaction [credit maze runner] that "turned me on" considering seeing her had no effect, due to her age, but seeing the plug action despite before reproduct age, made me dizzy and inflate. 
"oil your plug" she whispered. in hebrew "teka".  the contact was not pleasant too soon from the release. i whispered "condom?" she made a "you crazy" face and said "i am seven." meaning no risk of pregnancy. i admitted, "i am scared you will scream"
"i will scream if you delay longer."
yikes!
as she stood i moved forward slowly, hoping she would say "fooled you" or whatever but she kept moving the didlo with one hand. with the other hand moved the dress to cover my plug tube with her pale orange dress. it had those neat parallel pleats that i find very sexy yet neatly covering as they spread and rejoin in each step covering the legs. on the toilet was too high but when she came down still i was too tall. I leaned back against the wall and crouched and she used her dress to cover the tube and under it her fingers bent the tube forward and i crouched my knees and when she was ready... slurp. she slid onto the oily tube.

she had prepared with the dildo and was stretched and oiled double oil. i was too scared to move.
i cannot describe the feeling but it differed from adult intimacy. first she just breathed quickly then she started moving and i did not know where place i was. i did not know time how long. i looked up at her face and saw an ecstasy that made me  VERY jealous but only for a moment until my conciousness switched off.
i awoke as she unplugged. she pulled another card from her pocket and checked which card it was. 
she said "i was needing that." and handed me her family business card "next week same place."  she whispered.
i whispered back, calm that she had not regretted, "you gave me pleasure" as i covered myself again.
"get out already we need to get back to school." she urged.
i left the room. a man was waiting by the door and i said "i made very stinky" he laughed and followed me away from the toilet room to a different man room in the bank. 
+the happy ending chapter 6
i left the bank more surprised at my surprise [credit maze runner] i knew seven years old sometimes want but so many years had passed since i was five so i was surprised. 
her weekly request was same as when i was five. boys want more frequently. girls know their pattern. now that i read the book maze runner i understand what he meant by "he was surprised at his surprise" but 2010 was after he wrote his book so he gets credit for the idea. 
i returned to the school and taught the fifth graders math. my confusion caused a hazy daze the buzz felt like after 60 mililiters of flavored vodka. 
one brat whined "we learnt that yesterday" despite it was sunday or was it? i was no longer certain. i explained the multiplication and we did the practice and i assigned homework. 
"you cant give us homework" said wendy, we are only the extra dumb class and already have homework." 
i wanted to say "you succeeded you are not dumb" but i was still in shock from what i had done. should i feel guity? society laws are correct for most girls but rarely... or how rare? now i have doubts.
i would not risk teaching at the school and after the lesson told crab "i see why teachers wont teach here."
he argued "you are the first one to get those kids to do their meth i mean math."
you know why i could not stay in ashdod. i was compelled to return to the cleaning job. i kept the family business card to ask her if she regrets.
when i saw a teen video, a few months ago, it reminded me that this year she turned 18 so i called the number on the card. "can i speak to doris?"
"take your order please?" [credit south park but she really said "what ordering?].
"are you doris?"
"yes," answered doris.
"i taught at bleep school".
"you jerk! i wanted you to come back and you left me!" doris accused but not the accusation i had feared.
"you dont regret?" i asked surprised.
"i thought about you for years i wanted more."
"by now you probably found someone your age." i comforted doris.
"a woman you jerk. dont ever call me again."
"wait a second." i begged.
"what" she said annoyed.
"i am sorry for leaving you."
"why did you leave?"
" i was scared that people would know."
"i thought because you thought i was gross"
"only i was scared"
"come to ashdod, you probably look the same."
"i started shaving."
she giggled. "take a train TOMORROW you jerk."
she encouraged me to protest society "pain differs from consent" she helped me get permission from the other students but i do not remember the religious school now twelve years later... although they probably hit with a crime relying on the violent jewish religious books. which the sadists rejoice justifies them "i hit to obey proverbs" the sadist claims.
why did i wait? i could not tell such a story unless doris did not regret. until she reached 18 in november 2021. would anyone believe me that she threatened me using a stapler?
for twelve years i kept the business card and hid the secret dreading the stuff that happens to men around me... consent of a minor does not count. period.

abridged version of "wonderland", 4, by carol edited by n. tal

continued from

https://thinkforyourselfn8.blogspot.com/2022/02/abridged-version-of-wonderland-by-carol.html

wonderland chapter 4 The Rabbit's home, by carol, abridged version editor tal
  the White Rabbit was coming slowly toward her again, and was looking about for something. she heard it say to itself `Oh my dear paws! Oh my fur and whiskers! Where did i drop them?' Alice guessed that it was looking for the fan. she began searching helpfully and noticed that everything had changed since her swim. she lookd to where the glass table had been but despite its height she could not see it. also the doors and the low door had vanished.
  the Rabbit saw Alice, and said, `Mary Ann, what ARE you doing here? Run home and get a pair of gloves and a fan. +dont skip activity "Alice ran in "the direction it pointed to." she came to a small house. on its door was a bright brass sheet with the name `W. RABBIT'. She obeyed by entering. she rushed so she would not meet the real Mary Ann who would send her out before she had found the fan and gloves. [justifiably skip thinking.] she found a fan and three pairs of tiny white gloves on a table by a window. she also saw a little bottle that stood near the looking-glass +but she was hurrying so she went to the table. BEFORE she took the fan, she grew and got stuck. she rememberd that the fan had shrunk her but she was TOO big to move her arm and get it. she realized that the fan's effect had ended. [i censored the error of rushing yet not rushing. and the fan shrinking flaw if she had grabbed it already and the animal pain and much thinking.]  
 She grew until her head was pressing against the roof, so she crouched.  she wished that she held the fan, but it was too late to wish that. She grew more and more. she needed to sit on her knees, +with one elbow against the door, and the other arm out the window. when she poked her toes into a fireplace and up the chimney, she did not grow larger. she felt trapped and sad. she was also annoyed that she had been ordered about by a mouse and a rabbit. she decided, "when I grow up, I'll write a book about this shrinking and stretching, but I'm grown up now."
 she heard his voice, and listened: `Mary Ann! Mary Ann! get my gloves.' she trembled so much that she shook the house. when she was silent, the Rabbit came to the door but Alice's elbow was pressed against it. Alice heard it say to itself "I'll go in by the window.' She heard the Rabbit under the window so her hand grabbed some air. She did not hold anything. she heard a cry and a crash of broken glass. She concluded that it was possible it had fallen into a glass cucumber-frame, or something of the sort.
 she heard the Rabbit's angry voice, `Pat! Pat!' a voice she had never heard before replied, `I'm here! Digging for apples.
`Come and help me out of THIS!' + she heard more sounds of more broken glass. the rabbit continued, `tell me, Pat, what's that in the window?' pat answered `it's an `arrum.'
 `An arm? that size? it fills the whole window!'
+ `Sure, it does, but it's an arm.' [dont skip too much conversation only a bit]. she grabbed again. she heard TWO cries. [ correct to skip too much thinking except a bit: +"I don't want to stay in here any longer!']
  She heard wheels, and many voices. she could hear them say: `Where's the other ladder?" +"I only had one, Bill has the other." "Bill bring it here." a silent minute passed until she heard, "Will the roof bear you?" "yes." "Bill go down the chimney!'  she heard a little animal scratching about in the chimney.  
 she heard a SNEEZE from in the chimney, and then shocked voices said together `Bill is flying!' 
 after a minute, she heard the Rabbit's voice, "what happened to you? Tell us about it.' a weak voice said "i sneezed from the ash and moved up the chimney like a Jack-in-the-box. i flew up in the air like a rocket' +`So you did' said the others. 
  soon, little pebbles came in a window, and some of them hit her face.  they HURT so she shouted, `You must not do that again'. Alice saw that some of the pebbles on the floor changed into little yellow cakes and others into orange cakes. she remembered that orange shrunk her so [dont skip! " she thought it must make me smaller". she lowered her head and stretched her tongue and ate one orange cake. she shrunk until she was small enough to go through the door. 
  she took one of each color cake hoping to get into the grand garden and for regrowing to her natural size. she now took the fan and a pair of gloves as ordered. she ran out from his home and lay the fan and gloves by the entrance. a crowd of little animals and birds was outside. +do not skip CHARACTERS! The little Lizard, Bill, lay in the middle, by two guinea-pigs. The group ran toward Alice so she ran from them into a thick forest. [skip thinking, have enough already! BUT don't delete CHARACTERS!]
  She heard a dog's bark so she looked up. a puppy, much bigger than her was looking down at her with large eyes. she felt frightened that it would step on her or might be hungry, she was in DANGER it could eat her or injure her. Alice hid behind a bush to save herself from getting run over, and getting trampled under its feet. she threw an orange cake. it ate it and shrunk. now that it was not big enough to step on her, she stopped being scared. it ran around the bush toward her and then ran far away from her. the puppy continued a series of short charges at her by running a very little bit forward each time and a longer distance away. it was barking all the time. when it sat down far away, with its tongue hanging out of its mouth, and its great eyes half shut, Alice knew it was tired from running and now no danger. she threw the yellow cake. it ate it and grew to natural puppy size.
She ran until she felt tired. "Such a dear little puppy it was' thought Alice. she leaned against the green stem of a yellow buttercup which was larger than her. she used a leaf to fan herself. Alice looked all around her at the flowers and grass. 
she saw a mushroom the same height as herself +[dont delete activity! "she looked under it on both sides of its stem, and behind it. last, she stretched herself up on tiptoe, and looked on its top, over the edge of the mushroom's roof. her eyes met those of a large blue caterpillar, that was sitting on it. its arms were folded.

c5 Advice from a Caterpillar

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there.

abridged, "wonderland" 2, 3, by carol edited by n. tal

abridged "wonderland" 2, 3,  by carol edited by n. tal 

continued from

https://thinkforyourselfn8.blogspot.com/2022/01/abridged-version-for-alices-amazing.html

ali had more danger and bizarre surprises too 

CHAPTER 2 Tears

after Alice ate the tiny cake which had frosting both colored and flavored orange, she grew tall. She said to her feet, "Good bye, feet' [should not skip:] when she looked down at her feet, they seemed very far away. [justifiably skipped thinking] then her head reached the 9 foot roof of the low hall. she took the golden key and hurried to open the low door. she was lying on her side looking into the garden with one of her eyes. she was further away from fitting than before. her eyes filled with tears and Alice began to cry again. she cried gallons of tears that made a large puddle.

she heard feet running and dried her eyes to see what was coming. It was the White Rabbit holding a fan and hurrying. when the Rabbit came near her, she began, in a soft voice, `If you please, sir...' but before she could continue, the Rabbit dropped the fan, and ran away. Alice picked up the fan. the hall was hot, so she started fanning herself. She asked herself, "now that i changed tall, Who am I? i am not any other girl because SHE is her not me." she saw that she was shrinking small again.

She went to the table to compare herself. now she was shorter and continuing to shrink. she thought that the fan was causing this. she was in salt water up to her chin. she feared she would shrink until nothing and was in DANGER of reaching her end, so she dropped the fan.

she swam to the low door and found it was locked again, the golden key was lying on the glass table as before, Alice thought "now I am further from reaching the key than ever. I never was so small as this before, never!" she was in the tears which she had wept when she was nine feet high. [dont skip:] she swam to find the shore. she heard splashing nearby. she swam nearer to it and saw a mouse. she hoped it could talk same as the rabbit.

she began: `O Mouse, do you know the way out?" it said nothing so she began speaking again. the first sentence in her French lesson-book was: `Ou est ma chatte?' which means cat. understandably, the Mouse leaped up out of the water. it trembled with fright.

`Oh, I beg your pardon!' said Alice, "I quite forgot you don't like cats.'

`Not like cats!' cried the Mouse, `Would YOU like cats if you were me?'

`No,' said Alice in a soothing tone: `still, I wish I could show you our cat Dinah. if you could see her. She is such a dear quiet thing,' [dont skip:] "she swam lazily about in the salt water sea. the Mouse was trembling down to the end of his tail, so she pledged `We won't talk about her anymore.'

`We?' cried the Mouse, "as if I would talk about those killers. Our family HATED cats: nasty, immoral things!"

Alice, hurried to change the subject to dogs: "near our home lives a nice little bright-eyed terrier, with oh, such long curly brown hair!" she exclaimed. then alice continued, "it'll fetch things when you throw them, and it'll sit up and beg for its dinner, and all sorts of things. I can't remember. it is very useful: it kills rats and, oh dear!' cried Alice in a sorrowful tone. the Mouse was hastily swimming away from her so she called softly after it, `Mouse dear! Do come back. i won't talk about cats... or dogs either. When the Mouse heard this, it turned back and swam to her. it said in a low trembling voice, `We ought to go to the shore. there I'll tell you why I hate c's and d's.'

she felt crowded by the many animals and birds that were near her. she noticed a rare Dodo. "my name is Lory" somebody said. Also a Duck and an Eaglet were with her. the mouse swam and led Alice and the whole party to the shore.

CHAPTER 3; A Caucus-Race and a Long Tale

They all were wet: the birds' feathers dripped and the animals' fur stuck close to them.

"we must dry ourselves very soon," said Alice, "or else we will become ill."

"how will we get dry again?" someone asked. [dont skip the argument with the Lory]

Lory argued with Alice, "You are wrong, I am older than you, and must know better'. Alice realized it had not said any good reason nor source so decided not to continue the argument.

the Mouse called out, `Sit down, all of you, and listen to me! I'LL soon make you dry.' They all sat down at once, in a large ring around the Mouse in the middle. "This is the driest thing I know." he talked about something boring.

when it said, "Stigand, the patriotic archbishop of Canterbury, found it advisable..." the Duck asked, `Found WHAT?'

`Found IT,' the Mouse repeated, "you know what "it" means.'

`usualy "found it" means "find a thing,' said the Duck, "a frog or a worm. The question is, what did the archbishop find?'

The Mouse ignored this question, but hurriedly continued about something boring. finaly it asked Alice, "How are you now, my dear?'

`As wet as before," answered Alice.

The Dodo said "i know a house near here. we can dry ourselves. after we are cumf-tirbil we can hear the mouse tale". they walked by the water. everything had changed so the water flowed like a river. by it sprouted reeds and flowers. dodo led the slow march. he wanted to go faster and became impatient. the duck led the others slowly but dodo went faster with alice, the parrot named lori and the eaglet. soon they came to a small house. inside, they switched out of the wet clothes and used towels to dry as much as they could. then they sat by a blazing fire-place to dry their hair, covered in blankets to get warm, the others arrived and dried themselves by the flames. finally all were dry again. Dodo announced "we have competed with the water and EVERYBODY has won, and all must have a prize.'

`Who will give the prizes?' voices asked.

`Alice,' said the Dodo. She put her hand in her pocket, and pulled out a box of sweets. the salt water had not got into the box. she gave them as prizes one to each.

"she must get a prize herself,' said the Mouse.

`Of course,' the Dodo replied. `Alice, what else have you got in your pocket?' `a thimble,' said Alice.

`Hand it to me,' said the Dodo. the Dodo gave her the thimble. they all cheered. 

the large birds ate and complained that they could not taste theirs. the small ones choked so others patted on their backs to expel it.

they sat down again in a ring.

`You promised to tell me your story,' said Alice to the Mouse.

`Mine is a long and a sad tale!' said the Mouse.

`It IS a long tail," said Alice, looking at the Mouse's tail; `but why do you call it sad?' the Mouse told its own tale shaped like a thin bent tail: "it said to me:

"I will judge YOU,

I'll take no denial

We must have a trial.

this morning I've nothing to do."

I asked, "With no judge nor jury?"

"I'll be judge, I'll be jury,

I'll decree your death."'

"you're wasting your breath."

the mouse interrupted its tale and said, `You are NOT listening."

`A knot!' said Alice, let me untie it' the Mouse walked away. Alice said `you're so easily offended, you know. I wish for our cat Dinah to come here." the birds hurried away. +[don't skip too much conversation!:] one old Magpie said `I must go home." a Canary called out in a trembling voice to its children, `Come my dears! It's time you were all in bed!' all moved away.

Alice was left alone. she regretted mentioning the cat to birds. Alice began to cry again, for she felt very lonely. she again heard footsteps so she looked toward the sound.

FOUR

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there.