dear diary

some fun parts from my autobiography now that enuf time has passed that nobody remembers who i emt.
dear diary
i recall the afternoon when my mom gave me a diary to write in she wanted me to write my feelings
but iu was not 'born yesterday" and  i knew her sick personality so the first hing i did was ask her if it was "private and as expected she lied that it would be secret i could write any secrte so iasked do you promise not to read it? and she promised not tp read it? do you trust her? adults lie all the time sucker.
so i had to decide what i should write to cathc her reading it
as soon as i write th eltter i ma was back in the room pestering me to write something "i am" so "let me see it" but you promised not to read it at that moment i felt like  i hated her so i wrote "today i feell like i hate my mother". then i hid it under the mattress.
at dinner mom said "i am so angry at you for hating me.... now you know she is a liar she promoised not to read it.
did i say i hated you/ --"i have proof in writing"== after you promised not tpo readit and lied you deserve more than hate.
she ran out of the room and dad punished me for "makming ma cry' he would have hit me too... except the last time my parents hit me i wentto a neighcbors house and called the police on them and they were arrested and questioned and warned that i would go to a foster home.
so i vhave many gret stories to write in a diary and some worth sharing unlike a diatry but like an auto biography simply because i had such gross parents.
so here is an excitindg story
around age 16 years i started feeling very strong urges for sex. i was signifacant;ly ;ater than the boys around me some homosexual who invited me to join the gay club but i was not interessted in sex yet.
now around age 16 or 15 the bulge in my pants was almost constant and i could not concentrate on school studies so i would walk around pacing trying to calm down and everyone around me saw the bulge in the pants.
one afternoon a young boy perhaps age 9 came to watch because he had heard about the sight to see.
 he sent a friend to call me tp meet him on the steps. as i turned the corner to go down some stairs he leaned his hands upwards with just a few inches between then about an inch from either side of my fly. the pressure felyt AMAXZING i wanted so badly tp squeeze with my own hands but thought that was bad so now i had some counterpressure and it dfelt sp good.
i told him my name and what city i was from [i grew up in new yrk city] and he made small talk  like his name was peter [fake] until the sensation calmed and then he offfred me the deal of the cuentury
if i would let him put his male finger in my backdoor he would give me a twenty dollar bill of his birthday  i rplied i do not need money and that sounds weird.
but fate had a plan my roommate raided my briefs drawer and was shocked thgat my size was so mucg smaller than his.
one fateful evening after the dormitory dinner of chicken nad boiled peas a boy said that my roomamte from park heights [fake] wanted to meet me in the dorm room for a fun social freindship.
so i walked from the "mess hall" to the dorm and as i opened the door my roomamte grabbed my shoulders adn spun me so i fell onto his bed with my shoulders pinned and announced lets wrestle.
"no i dont want to wrestle get off of me" i protested and he did he flipped me over so i piinned his shoulder and then pointed out that he saw that my bried size was 32 which was odd considering i was not skinny and his were 38. and he was skinny i was mad that he went throuhgh the drawer but the fact was he felt i should buy bigger size briefs.
but i would need money suddenly the 20 dollar bill was just what i bneeed.
suddenly his arms slid from my shoulders down the sides of my shirt and towards my hips i leaped backward off him and said i am not ready for that now. i offered to meet him in the shower during hoemwork time.
skip ahead to the youth.
the next afternoon i searched for the nine yearold and named peter [fake] and said i will not accept cash but if he would go woith me and pay for the underwear i would let him insert for sixty seconds on the clock.
that night wwalked together off campus to the suit shop and i bought the mens small size of briefs many sizes larger than the timy briefs my parents had bought for me only because they had to...
the kid paid with his birthday present and i was tempted to say 'i tricked you" biut i was actually curious to see if he would realy do it.
so we went to the mall toilets and he stood on the toilet and opened his pants and took a "wipe" from his backpack and said clean his male finger. i said i am scared to touch it soi you clean it. so i watched him wipe from all sides and was syurprised that it stayed soft. my own finger was bulging. apparently because my briefs were to small and were pressing too much. then he said time to clean you and i faced my back to the 9 year old and he reached around from both sides to unbuckle my belt and open the button and zipper. then he slid the pants down my hips nad and slowlslid his hands up my hips
next he grasped the waistband and rolled it down my hips and said lean forward.
he reached in with the "wet wiper" and rubbed many times around the back door.
nexyt he put oil around it and that felt slimy and finally his soft male finger leaned against the rounded right side of my back as he leaned the pressure made his male finger swell and harder with his other hand he spread oil on my male finger i almost forgot to count the sixty seconds. as he slid his oiled ale figer in the back door slowly slding inward and at the same rate sliding his finger along my own extended male finger once he was fully inside he honestly beeped his watch for the sixty second timer and began sliding back and forth as he moved away hsi hand slid in teh same direction towards my stomach and then he leaned forward and his finger slid forward i felt so much p;leasure i lost track of time but soon he pulled out and it was time fr cleanup. he announced his surprise that no milk came out of me. said we need to meet again o he can milk me. he used the wet wipees to clean the oil from my back door and others o claen his male finger. thejn he held the new briefs and i stepped into them and slid them up they were much roomier stupuid parent buying me the wrong size underwaera if not for gay teenagers i would never have thought to buy a bigger size but more stories will follow if i have time to type now that twenty tears passed and nobody knows who those people are. to be continued when i get a chance.