sbasjin's vagarius-vacation
note vagary is eccentric.
a teen named sbasjin "split" sobil knew he had emotional difficulties. his parents gave up hope of getting him out of bed in the morning... for school. sure they HAD tried, yelling shaking pulling, in the past, but nothing worked. also they knew that they cannot hit him the way they would hit a "mule" who would not pull a plow.... that would iinjure him and they would get caught.... stupid modern society. so they were powerless and sbasjin missed the first classes of school... day after day.
at first pa and ma accused him of being lazy... which had no effect until the afternoon when he returned from school and "proved" look at my high scores in the classes i attend". pa was impressd and conceded that proves he is not lazy.... but if so why cant open his eyes in the morning. ma insisted "i do not need to admit i was wrong" and continued calling him lazy until she too saw no change.
they confessed to each other that they wished that they could hit him kuz that would compel him to get out of bed and go to school... but knew they would get caught.
to make matters worse sbasjin refused to go to the general doctor for checkups. he argued that doctors were only for when you are ill not checkups that is just a CAPITALISTIC trick to take away your money. his parents argued "it is our money and we wanna spend it on your doctor." he argued "pay the doctor! but i am not going." once they bothered to drive him to an apartment building that did not look like a clinic but whe he saw the doc sign... he started shouting "you filthy scum trying to trick me! i should break the windows of your car! lets see you pay for that!" pa kept to himself that his son had good reason to be angry and also thout that the explosion was from his wifes manic-sad. what a tuf kid and he was only fourteen years old.
sbasjin had contnued: "and when i WAS sick and coughing that was when you abandoned me! i needed the doc then and said take me then.... but YOU would not get off the phone talking and talking as i lay in bed weak and coughing i felt so weak i was scared of dying and then i wanted a doc but you like talking too much. dad had blurted out, in the corridor "i was not home yet from work, when you had ever, so dont blame me." ma exploded "blame? he was just coughing what the big deal!" dad took his sons side "honey you do talk too much sweety." she exploded with accusations at dad who squinted at the accusations and stood silent for her angry rant.
at one point she yelld "answer me you are ignoring me." pa stood silet and squinted she began repeating in frustration "dont just stand there, answer me, answer me answer me answer me." finally pa raised his hand and said "you do talk too much." ma had stormed out of the building to take a taxi home. the boys had walked to the car and dad had repeated "i know you had fever that day. i apologize for her."
ever since that trick, he had not been ill and refused to go for capitalistic checkups claiming "you can pay a doc when YOU are not ill but i will not cooperate."
the year passd as sbasjin missed one or two classes each morning. finally the last day of school arrived and vacation would begin. the prinicipal called in sbasjin. "well well well. i just saw your report card of grades". s' nodded. your attendance in three classes is not enuf to advance to ninth grade.
s' protested "three? i only got one f!--well attendance is also a factor. so you will stay in 8th= -|th grade.--divide the courses! i can advance in the ones i passed.--nope we wont do that--so i repeat the one i succeeded?" askd split incrdelously. the principal frowned and realized the policy was stupid but hey he did not make the policy. sbastion had another suggestion "shift my classses so the ones i passed are in the morning.--i dont care about the schedule. i wont change anything. you come every morning or else." s' thout quickly and said "as you wish." the principal protested "dont blame me, i agree the policy is stupid but i am only the principal." s' ignored him and left.
s' was furious he would be expected to repeat the school next year and probly miss the SAME morning classes again! in mornings he simply could not open his eyes. well no point trying in school anymore. a voice came from behind "sbasjin! get back in here!--why? you said what you had to say?--kuz you never said why are you late? dont party late!-- i dont party late! i lay to sleep at eleven, which should be seven hours sleep but i do not fall asleep and in the morning i feel too weak to open my eyes--WEAK?? exclaimed the principal, "that could be depression you need serotonin drugs.--but i am not ill! i dont want any stupid capitalist drugs--kid you DO have syptoms now don be shy about your condition and get treatment."
s' sighed. as he walked out from the office to the school bus, principal pete paxtin phoned s's pa at work. pa argued "no school anyway we can let him sleep--not if it is caused by brain chemicals."insisted paxtin.
dad phoned a private psychiatrist and asked if he could just get a prescription. "usually i dont do that but your wife told me about your son. let me ask him a few questions--send me the form to my app and i will send it to him." a few beeps later s' was typing the answer to the questions of the form as he rode the bus home. dad got the copy and zapd it to the shrink. the shrink glanced at the replies and wrote back to p, "try "x" and the photo prescription. pa drove to the pharmacy and by the time the bus brought s' home the drug was there.
pa echoed the pharmacist, "take one in the morning with breakfast--that is stupid. i dont eat breakfast til ten!--then take some bread in a bag to bed, and in the morning the pill will be by your pillow to overcome the depression.--whatever." s' moand.
as usual s' skipd dinner claiming he was "still full from lunch". s' had no appetite and he had not really eaten his lunch! the green pepper always tatsed bitter to him, the bread and jelly was too sweet and somehow soggy he just threw it out. almost every day. now he felt gross too. he just went to his bed, switched on a ceiling fan and lay with his eyes shut. pa brought a bag with a slice of bread and the plastic bubbles with pills.
s' got out of bed and said i dont want crumbs in my sheets pa thout the bag prevented that but did not argue. s' laid them on the desk and lay down on the bed and shut his eyes. s' had reason to feel sad all his efforts for school was wasted now that he had to repeat class. well he certainly would not. he simply would not go. but he could not stay here... he would find a place to hide.
soon s' was dreaming. he saw a lady with blond hair and huge bumps in her shirt. he did not even see the color of the shirt all he saw was the bumps huge like a pair of footballs... not european but the pointy footballs. just as quickly he heard his alarm beep. and looked to see 7:30. s' moaned. he felt like he had not slept but knew time to take the drug... but... he could not reach the desk! well he did not really feel like taking it anyway.
he did wanna practice balancing on one leg. that was a fun challenge and he set a time and tried to see how long and felt happy when he succeeded but now he did not even care to try and no school today it was vacation and for him the vacation would never end... he was not gonna keep repating school just kuz of stupid policy.
s' had doubts: what should i do first? maybe i should do the fun challenge first? balance? his mind argued: "i can do that later... no i cant! the summer will be too hot! sbasjin "found himself jumping out from bed".... he recalled that this never happened before. but now that he was free from school... he did not feel the heaviness that he usually felt.
insted of bread with the pill he could make oatmeal... that was instant. he could flavor it with syrup of fruit jel or peanut butter... he was not sure which.
s' ran from his bed room and around the corner to the kitchen. it was empty. his parents were not there... they had left for work without trying to wake him! the time showed 9 am. OH NO! s' added a cuss word too... soon it will be too hot to exercise.
he grabbed a packet of instant oatmeal and ripd it open and poured the oats in a bowl. then he went to boil the water in the "quik boiler" but his body puld him back. he heard voices in his head shouting "you did not take your pill yet! go to your room and take your pill" his body startiing walking back to his room... and he recalled he cant take the pill until the oatmeal is ready and he had not switched on the boiler! another voice shouted "first do the exercise before it gets hot." a third voice shouted a different idea "you cant exercise in pyjama you will get too sweaty!" the "audience"doubted what to do first and the argument raged as sbasjin wandered to his bedroom... would he change clothing there or to take the pill or to exercise... he doubted what to do first!
he yankd off his pyjama shirt so he would not feel hot but stared confused at his clothing. what should he wear for exercise? he could wear shorts but maybe if he wore two layers briefs and shorts he would sweat too much! maybe he should wear a bathing suit less layers!
while he considered that, his legs carried him back to the kitchen to start the water boiling... he had not switched on the boiler... he could dress while the oatmeal soaked. the voice urged him "you gotta take the drug in the morning! recall how you felt when you first awoke!" sbasjin tryd to recall and felt confused: how he exited bed?? who had pulled him from bed? but he needs food for the pill. the voices shouted "you only took off your shirt. walking around with long pyjama pants in the summer will make you sweaty." the nerd noticed that sometimes the voices said "i and sometimes you". who was shouting in his head??
as he reached the boiler his hand hesitated by the switch. he had bread in his room! he coulda eaten the bread with the drug. immediately! instead of walking back and forth several times and he had not changed from his pyjama to the shorts for exercies either. in fact the alking was making him feel hot.
anyway better to have the oatmeal for lunch! so he did not switch on the electric boiler pot. he walked back to the room... again... and felt hot from walking back and forth. the heat reminded him to hurry... he had not started exercising yet, he needed to start exercising before the heat increased, and he had awoke after nine. and he must wait tile he changed clothes... "but you did not take your pill" another voice shouted.
all the walking back and forth to the kitchen was also heating him up and the pyjama pants were hot too, he had to pull them off but what would he wear insted. again he walked to the closet... passing the pill which he had not taken... he must rush to exercise before the heat increased and he could not wear layers.... as he walked to the desk confused what to do first... take the pill or dress for exercise? he must dress before exercise. so back to the clothing but he had not taken the pill! back to the desk... the "audience" heard the voices arguing, each pushing his body a different direction and "he" did not know who was right? maybe the pill should be first but he felt hot already and dressing would take time...
sbasjin grabd a swim suit and swapd the pyjama pants off for the swim suit. and finally recald the bread and the pill. he jamd the bread into his mouth and chewd impatiently. the bread felt gross, and had no taste and he had no apetite despite skipping lunch and supper yeasterday.bread had almost no taste and the bread taste was hollow. as he gagd down the bread he followd it with the pill... he saw almost an hour had passed! yikes!
he had been wandering from room to room confused for so long. finally he had switched clothing and swallowed the pill and he could start exercising. he did the warm up but felt very thirsty.
just stretching made him feel so hot! he glugged a tall glass of water and saw the bread must be soaking his liquid. he stretched some more then started to stand on one leg. that was a challenge he would try to see how long he could stand. as he stood he started swaying. his leg could not support him. that was the challenge! he counted as long as he could and tried to break his record to stand long... before needing to lean on the second foot. finally he was doing the exercise... that he had wanted to do since leaving bed, but coud not do kuz he had needed to change clothing first! and that was delayed by wandering... kuz he wanted the pill first...
the pill started making him feel dizzy and nauseas... it must be the pill he never felt dizzy from balancing. he grabd the packet and read the paper and found the side effects including dry mouth.
soon he felt so dizzy he had to sit. the nausea intensified as he sat by his desk reading the paper about side effects... he regreeted taking the pill that made his feel so gross... in fact he had left bed easily today! he was not depressed somehow? how had he left bad?
yet still it had been late at 9! he set an alarm and pland: tmoro the bread in a bag would prevent crumbs by his pillow. he would take the drug in bed instead of waiting. but if the drug made him dizzy when would he do the exercise? hw must hurry before the drug dissolves inside! why had he not prepared clothing? he always prepd his cothing the night before... ah due to no school he had not botherd. well for the sake of exercise he would need to prepare clothing for tmoro so this did not repeat. or.... he could just swap into his bathing shorts as soon as he swallowed the pill yes that was the solution. he put the shorts by his bed. put the bag with the bread and bubble-pak of pills beside his pillow and decided tomorrow would be better... then his stomach churned and he felt like he was gonna vomit... he lay on the floor... what a shame if the pill came out afte he finally started taking the pill... sbasjin lay on the floor as the room seemd to spin. he felt hungry and thirsty at the same time. he recallled that he HAD drunk the tall glass yet his lips were dry must be a side effect of the pill. he felt the room spin and his stomach churned he was lying down the same as if he HAD NOT taken the white tablet! but at least he had exercised and had tried to stand on his foot. he lay hoping that tmorow he would be more organized. he struggled to keep his stomach from emptying and waited for the dizziness and nausea to pass.... but it dragd on and dragd on... was there really any difference between being too depressd to leave bed.... than being too nauseas to stand?
sbasjin felt hopeless so he just waited and waited and waited ... finally his parents came home and shouted "split we are home" kuz that was his nickname. split thout that perhaps he wanderd around due to his split personality pulling him in different directions. if he was simply undecided he woulda stood in one lace but the personality had each dragd him to do different stuff and interrupted the other.
split yeld from his room "i am out a bed." ma ran and opend the door "get off the floor you always sleep late" pa protested "he IS out from bed--it doesnt matter he is just too lazy. why are you wearing swim shorts?? whined ma in an exasperated tone, "just be glad he made it outa bed." pa said noticing the empty bag that he had put on the desk with bread and commented "i see you ate the bread--with the pill and now i am gonna vomit" moand split. his parents started arguing about side effects and faking. split moand "could you take your argument somewhere else." pa walked away ma glared at each "man child". then hissed "get up off the floor!". split ignored her and pa yeld back "dont you have ears? he said he is dizzy--he is faking and lazy, same as every day--actually no school today" commented pa. "well he cant just lay all day--i wont" replied split. ma repeated "look at you laying on the floor all day." pa returned and said "stop annnoying him. there are many hours in the day lets see what happens--no he has to get up!-- honey that is you compulsiveness. read the side effects of the pill--what pill? he does not need pills he needs to stop being lazy. he needs a whipping that is what he needs.
ma lost her temper and kicked sbasjin's arm...
pa grabd her and puld her away and said "i was waiting for this for years". he tied her arms with a shirt and pulled her to a doorknob where he tied the shirt to a door knobe very tightly. she yanked and yanked.
pa called the cops and simply told the truth "my wife got mad and kicked my son she is hysterical and dangerous. perhaps she needs a night at a mental hospital too." then pa stared at his family... all mentally ill... poor kid had a double dose... ma's manic-hysteria with his anxiety... pa started sweating. his heart accelerated as he waited for the cops.... for no reason they were both subdued... sbasjin waited on the floor moaning. pa waited pacing. the cops did not arrive for an hour and the wait was agonizing. pa popd some of his pills as ma yankd on her "leash" and sobd. sbasjin just lay on the floor moaning and clutching his stomach. he was clearly gagging and struggling to keep the pill in his stomik. dad thout "what a pathetic nerd" but hurrried to bring pillows from his bed, and wife's pair too. plus the two that sbasjin had requested he piled the pillows under splits head. he warned ma "the more you shout the more their gona think you lost your mind" ma sobd hystericly and even babbled. by the time the cops came with the ambulance escort, the doc's decided to inject her and take her for a week. pa assured them "we are all taking pills but hers are not working today."
the cops took the report of the kick one mutterd "kicking a mentally ill teen." emphasizing some violence is even worse than kicking. "we will covince the judge to put her way a long time." pa tried to hide his smile but could not... finally some quiet and privacy. he glanced at his son moaning and felt comfort that sbasjin had not seen him grin. pa shouted to the docs "what should i give him for nausea?" as they draged ma out the door, they said "try dry crackers". pa saw there were none in the pantry! so he told split that he would buy some salt crackers. split said "my lips are so dry. crackers would make me dryer. do not bother." pa stood helplessly as his kid suffered... he recalled when he himself had started his drugs... and reassured split that in a few weeks the effects would be less. "WEEKS" exploded sbasjin in horror!
pa fled the room and ran to the kitchen to make lunch... the best balance would be toast and iced tea. and that is what pa started to prepare for lunch... pa mixed the iced tea "crystals" in cold water from the pipe on the frij door. he brout the glass to split. split moaned and said "my stomach feels so swollen" but he sipped and soon started sucking it in! "wow please another" gaspd split. so pa made a refil and delivered it.
he thout about his wife finally getting the care she needed at a mental hospital surely they would see the symptoms of hysteria and even manic-fury that he saw... ever since sbasjin ws born... luckily his problems were different... but poor sbasjin had probly inherited mental illness from each of them... poor kid. pa started to doubt "maybe i should never have married" hmm... he puffed out. he returned to the kitchen saw a bowl with dry oatmeal powder. pa wonderd which mental patient had started to make oatmeal and then ran away?? was it me??
___
the end
+ a rhyme:
a worrying teen in nantucket
wished his ill ma, would not kick the bucket
he gave her thik soks
and some expert docs...
when they faild,
he cussed "oh fukk it."
joke: when pa aged and shrunk, his end was near also his end was actually nearer
